วันอาทิตย์ที่ 30 พฤศจิกายน พ.ศ. 2551

Business: Keys To Negotiating Well

Whether it's buying a car, asking for a pay rise, saying 'no' to a friend or renting an apartment - at some stage in our lives we all are going to need to know how to negotiate. Yet, so few of us know the basic skills before embarking on life changing purchases or decisions! These 8 keys will assist you negotiate well.

1. Know the outcome you want.
Do you want a win-win outcome where both parties benefit? Or a win-lose outcome where someone (presumably the other party) is not happy with the result?

It is important you know what type of outcome you want because that will affect the long term relationship you have with the other party. Win-win outcomes are beneficial where you have an ongoing relationship. For example, when you negotiate a pay rise, you don't want your boss to feel he/she is the 'loser'. However, if you are buying a car from a car lot, you may not be so concerned about whether the car salesperson feels as though they 'won' in the negotiation!

2. Know your 'position'.
How important is this deal to you? How much do you need it? Could you walk away from the deal? What alternatives do you have? What is your "bottom line" and what (if anything) are you prepared to concede? You should not start negotiating until you have thought through and considered all of the consequences for all of the different outcomes that may eventuate.

3. Know your counterpart's 'position'.
Try to work out what is important to them in the deal. When you know that you have an advantage. Try not to reveal what is important to you! Keep a poker face and play your cards close to your chest.

4. Work out different scenarios ahead of time.
Being caught by surprise will NOT strengthen your position! Think through all the different possibilities which may eventuate and plan for each and every one of them. It is useful to brainstorm and write down on a piece of paper what could possibly happen. For example, if they said, "XYZ" - I would respond with, "ABC". This way you can be prepared for just about anything that may happen.

5. Know yourself.
Know your own weaknesses. If you are a more gentle personality your natural aversion to conflict may toss you into concessions that aren't necessary! If this is you, learn about yourself and take counter action. If you are overly stubborn and never give way to minor points, know this about yourself. Your stubbornness, holding out for 100% your own way, may cause you to lose a really great deal!

6. Back up your position with logic.
If you negotiate from a purely emotional position, emotion will sway you from your position. Fear of loss, sense of failure, conflict, pressure, sentiment! All can be applied to sway you from sticking to what you really want. When negotiating for a pay rise know what similar companies are paying for similar work. When placing an offer on a house substantiate your lower offer with the costs of repaving the driveway, renovating the bathroom, retiling the entrance?.or whatever you see needs doing. This is a much stronger position than plucking a number out of thin air!

7. Work out what you can concede.
Find something in the deal that for you will not be important but for your counterpart may be of significance. This will be like gold to you! A 'sweetener' can be what clinches the bargain in your favour. You will need to be poker faced and pretend this is a big deal to concede! Save this item for the final offer you make.

8. Have an exit strategy.
If everything goes against you, you will be saved by your contingency planning! If you don't feel in control, stop talking. Immediately!!! Make sure you are listening to the other person. If you are doing most of the talking the chances are you are doing most of the conceding. Offer to break the meeting and reconvene at another time when you have been able to consider what has already been put forward.

Skillful negotiation takes time and practice. Armed with these basic skills it doesn't matter how reticent you may feel towards negotiating an outcome you want! By applying these keys you will be well positioned to improve your negotiation skills and feel more empowered when approaching tricky situations.

? Kim Beardsmore

Kim is part of an international network of home business owners operating across 60 countries. We urgently require people to join our expanding international team. If you are interested in earning extra income around your current schedule, we would like to hear from you. We provide full training and ongoing support to ensure your success. Visit now: <a target="_new" href="http://free2liv.com/?refid=neg-567887384">http://free2liv.com/?refid=neg-567887384</a>

So Whats Your Argument?

Arguments aren't always bad things. Sometimes They're used to convince someone of an important point they may not yet realize.

You've probably used arguments in this way most of your life in fact!

Maybe you wanted to go somewhere and had to convince your parents that is was a good idea to let you go. So you argued your position with them.

Maybe you wanted to buy a big ticket item and had to argue the value of buying it with your spouse!

Arguments don't necessarily have to be shouting matches. They can simply be a device used to convince someone of something that you feel is important.

It's funny then, how so few sales people use the art of arguing to sell their products. Wouldn't a person who wants someone to buy something from them want to try and convince that one that it'd be a good idea?

Maybe it's because it's not such a good idea?

Could be why so many sales pitches are designed to connive potential customers into buying rather than giving them a convincing argument instead.

Let's face it . . .

Who'd want to argue a losing point?

After all, if a product is of little value, who in their right mind would want to take the position of trying to convince someone it had value?

Maybe that's why so few try to convince rather than connive!

But what is the difference between convincing and conniving anyway?

A conniver is like the person in a movie or TV show that's holding something they probably shouldn't be. Suddenly, a cop pulls up and he quickly passes the object to the person next to him with the words, "Here, take this quick!"

The poor unsuspecting by-stander is "left holding the bag", and doesn't know what hit him as he's dragged off to the pokey.

So, to put it simply . . .

A conniver is the person who tries to get you to do something without thinking about it. He creates a sense of urgency and force feeds it to you before you can say no.

Now a convincer is quite the opposite. He wants you to know what you're getting into and is willing to spend the time going over it with you. He has a valid argument and has no qualms about letting you hear it.

So, by the time he hands you the "bag", you know exactly what's in it, and you've been able to make a rational decision about whether you want to "hold" it or not.

This leaves us with two important questions . . .

If you're searching the Internet looking for product to buy, who would you rather run into?

If you're trying to sell valuable products on the Internet, which of the above two do you think you should be?

Hopefully, the argument is clear!

About The Author

Ken Nadreau is the author of "Power Suits for Online Marketers." A free report that explains the three most important aspects of sales, and how using them, turns the average marketer into a legitimate, "well dressed" professional.

<a href="http://taoenterprises.com/powersuit/index.html" target="_new">http://taoenterprises.com/powersuit/index.html</a>

<a href="mailto:krnadreau@taoenterprises.com">krnadreau@taoenterprises.com</a>

วันเสาร์ที่ 29 พฤศจิกายน พ.ศ. 2551

The Most Powerful Persuasion Skill Youll Ever Learn

Criteria Elicitation

This is without a doubt the most important persuasion skill that you can learn. If you'll learn to apply this to every situation in which you find yourself you'll be amazed at the positive results! Many of the hypnotic skills I'll be sharing with you have a parallel in old sales training techniques. This one is no exception! Lets say that you are needing to convince someone to do something, accept something, or behave in a certain way. You will need to communicate with their powerful subconscious to get your desired agreement. Once a person's subconscious &quot;buys in&quot; to what you are proposing they will just naturally seem to come over to your way of thinking. The question then becomes &quot;how do I get my message to the person's subconscious?&quot; Here's your answer-elicit their true criteria. Simply put, ask. Try this one SALESMAN John what's important to you when shopping for a new car? JOHN Well I like to know that the person I'm dealing with is honest.&quot; SALESMAN Yes honesty is the best policy. What else is valuable to you when you are making the decision about a car? JOHN I like to know the car has a high reliability rating from Consumer Reports SALESMAN an unreliable car is not an acceptable situation. What else is important john? JOHN I want to know that I got a really good price.

In the above can you put John's criteria in order of importance? If you chose 3, 2, 1 you were right! Our hypnotically trained sales man knew to ask at least three times what was really important or valuable. He agreed and parroted each answer so that John's SC would react to him as a friend (rapport) John's SC would give increasingly important info each time he was asked what's important. So our salesman needs to focus on showing John that he is getting a good price on a reliable car from a trusted advisor. When you need to convince someone first you should establish rapport. The easiest way to do that is to ask some questions about things important to that person. Some people go after rapport by starting with stuff like &quot;how do you like this weather?&quot; A great way to establish rapport is to share some detail from your own life first. &quot;John you should have been with me last week at the golf range! I was hitting them long and straight! Or &quot;my daughter just got the lead in the school play!&quot; People usually respond with instant liking for you when you share a detail from your life. Once you have conversed for awhile (small talk?) then you can get to the elicitation stage. &quot;Boss-what's important to you about how my sales job is performed?&quot; What else? What else?

Surveys are formalized attempts at criteria elicitation.

Once you know someone's criteria then you have the roadmap to structure your persuasion attempts. By focusing on their criteria you will be seen as perceptive, insightful and caring! &quot;Honey what's valuable to you in a relationship&quot; What else? What else?

Structure your communication to take advantage of the criteria that you have elicited and you'll always come out a winner!

Any Questions?

About The Author

John M. Satterfield is a certified hypnotherapist and the marketing director for a small chain of nursing homes in North Central Arkansas. He is married and lives in a home in the woods with his wife and his &quot;little blond psychiatrist&quot; the cocker Spaniel Sir Lancelot His web site is <a href="http://www.Hypnosisucanuse.com" target="_new">www.Hypnosisucanuse.com</a> You can sign up for his free ezine called Hypnosis You Can Use at <a href="mailto:hypnosisucanuse@getresponse.com">hypnosisucanuse@getresponse.com</a>

<a href="mailto:hypnosispower@yahoo.com">hypnosispower@yahoo.com</a>

Negotiating Tactics: Don?t Let ?Good Guy ? Bad Guy? Control the Sales Negotiation

Counter one of the classic negotiating gambits by addressing it directly.

You've assembled a brilliant sales proposal for a new client and when you arrive to the meeting to hammer out the final details, you suddenly find yourself sitting across the table negotiating with two people. One is a person with whom you've had contact during the sales process; the other is new ? a purchasing agent.

The former is characteristically warm, gracious, and quite friendly to your proposal. The latter is hard-nosed, aloof, and completely opposed to nearly every one of your positions. They are playing the classic negotiating tactic of 'good guy ? bad guy.'

In the audiobook, &quot;Sound Advice on Negotiating Skills,&quot; author Roger Dawson says that when buyers use good guy ? bad guy, they are counting on the salesperson being drawn to the good guy. Psychologically, the salesperson wants to please him or her by making concessions.

The solution, says Dawson ? a renowned speaker and author of the book, &quot;Secrets of Power Negotiating&quot; ? is to &quot;counter their tactic by letting them know that you realize what they're doing. It's such as well known negotiating tactic that when you say to them, 'Oh come on, you're not going to play good guy, bad guy with me, are you?' they become embarrassed they were caught and will back off.&quot;

Roger Dawson offers negotiating skills advice each week in the free audio newsletter from What's Working in Biz, <a href="http://www.whatsworking.biz/full_story.asp?ArtID=92" target="_new">http://www.whatsworking.biz/full_story.asp?ArtID=92</a>

About The Author

Richard Cunningham is a principal of What's Working in Biz, <a href="http://www.whatsworking.biz" target="_new">http://www.whatsworking.biz</a>, a publisher of business audiobooks and online audio programs on marketing, sales, and small business strategies.

วันศุกร์ที่ 28 พฤศจิกายน พ.ศ. 2551

Better Internal Proposals

A colleague of mine has a problem. We belong to the same association and he's been trying for quite some time, without success, to get support for one of his proposals.

His lack of results came to mind when a reader asked for ideas about making internal proposals more effective. As she noted in her message, it's necessary to make a business case for proposals, including costs and returns.

She's right, and I agree wholeheartedly. In fact I just finished a proposal to an organization I work with and had it accepted on that sort of basis.

But, I think all good proposals start where my colleague has trouble. They start with a clear and concise statement about the project: "This is what I recommend, this is the issue (problem or opportunity) it addresses, and these are the consequences (benefits) of doing what I recommend."

I frequently come across situations where ideas don't fly because the person making the proposal hasn't prepared that kind of analysis and statement. While the virtue of the ideas seems apparent to him or to her, it's not at all apparent to others. I've referred to it elsewhere as the 'Everybody knows' syndrome.

To do the analysis, and later write the statement, start with a description of the action that you want taken. In just a few words, write down the what you want to see happen, and how it changes the status quo. For example, I recently went to a meeting with a proposal that went like this: Change the duration of our event to four weeks from the current duration of six weeks, to reduce our costs during a slow period.

Next, name or list the people or functions involved. Who will take the action? Do you want just one person to act, or several, or many? And, if it involves a multi-stage action, set out the stages. For example, "I would like this committee to formulate a recommendation we can put to a vote at the annual meeting."

Follow that with a list of people and organizations affected by the action. Be thorough in this consideration; it's all to easy to forget the peripheral players. And very often peripheral players make a critical difference to our plans.

Now, is there a timeline or sequence of events that needs consideration before a decision can be made or implemented? Almost everything we do in large modern organizations is interconnected to other people and resources. And, what about contingencies? Does your proposal depend on something else happening?

Having thoroughly explored the proposal and its implications, we now turn to costs and benefits, the business case. What are the tangible and intangible costs? In the intangibles column, make at least a mental note of the emotional costs that key stakeholders will pay. The same is generally true of benefits, or the returns if we're talking about financial components. Remember the important role emotions often play in decisions.

In summary, then, take a strategic approach to internal proposals, an approach that identifies the issues, the players, and the consequences. This exercise allows you to be clear and concise because you have thought your way through the proposal carefully, and you know the key issues.

Robert F. Abbott writes and publishes Abbott's Communication Letter. Learn how you can use communication to help achieve your goals, by reading articles or subscribing to this ad-supported newsletter. An excellent resource for leaders and managers, at: <a target="_new" href="http://www.communication-newsletter.com">http://www.communication-newsletter.com</a>

Win-Win Power Negotiating

Let's talk about win-win negotiating. Instead of trying to dominate the other person and trick him into doing things he wouldn't normally do, I believe that you should work with the other person to work out your problems and develop a solution with which both of you can win.

Your reaction to that may be, &quot;Roger, you obviously don't know much about my industry. I live in a dog-eat-dog world. The people with whom I negotiate don't take any prisoners. They eat their young. There's no such thing as win-win in my industry. When I'm selling I'm obviously trying to get the highest price I possibly can, and the buyer is obviously trying to get the lowest possible price. When I'm buying the reverse is true. How on Earth can we both win?&quot;

So, let's start out with the most important issue: What do we mean when we say win-win? Does it really mean that both sides win? Or does it mean that both sides lose equally so that it's fair? What if each side thinks that they won and the other side lost-would that be win-win? Before you dismiss that possibility think about it more. What if you're selling something and leave the negotiation thinking, &quot;I won. I would have dropped the price even more if the other person had been a better negotiator&quot;? However the other person is thinking that she won and that she would have paid more if you had been a better negotiator. So both of you think that you won and the other person lost. Is that win-win? Yes, I believe it is, as long as it's a permanent feeling. As long as neither of you wakes up tomorrow morning thinking, &quot;Son of a gun, now I know what he did to me. Wait until I see him again.&quot;

That's why I stress doing the things that service the perception that the other side won, such as:

Don't jump at the first offer.

Ask for more than you expect to get.

Flinch at the other side's proposals.

Avoid confrontation.

Play Reluctant Buyer or Reluctant Seller.

Use the Vise gambit: You'll have to do better than that.

Use Higher Authority and Good Guy/Bad Guy to make them think you're on their side.

Never offer to split the difference.

Set aside impasse issues.

Always ask for a trade-off and never make a concession without a reciprocal concession.

Taper down your concessions.

Position the other side for easy acceptance.

Besides constantly servicing the perceptions that the other side won, observe these four fundamental rules:

Rule one of win-win negotiating: Don't narrow it down to just one issue

The first thing to learn is this: Don't narrow the negotiation down to just one issue. If, for example, you resolve all the other issues and the only thing left to negotiate is price, somebody does have to win and somebody does have to lose. As long as you keep more than one issue on the table, you can always work trade-offs so that the other person doesn't mind conceding on price because you are able to offer something in return.

Sometimes buyers try to treat your product as a commodity by saying, &quot;We buy this stuff by the ton. As long as it meets our specifications we don't mind who made it or where it comes from.&quot; They are trying to treat this as a one issue negotiation to persuade you that the only way you can make a meaningful concession is to lower your price. When that's the case you should do everything possible to put other issues, such as delivery, terms, packaging, and guarantees onto the table so that you can use these items for trade-offs and get away from the perception that this is a one-issue negotiation.

At a seminar, a commercial real estate sales person came up to me. He was excited because he'd almost completed negotiating a contract for a very large commercial building. &quot;We've been working on it now for over a year,&quot; he said. &quot;And we've almost got it resolved. In fact, we've resolved everything except price, and we're only $72,000 apart.&quot; I flinched because I knew that now that he'd narrowed it down to one issue, then there had to be a winner and there had to be a loser. However close they may be, they were probably heading for trouble. In a one-issue negotiation, you should add other elements so that you can trade them off later and appear to be making concessions.

So if you find yourself deadlocked with a one-issue negotiation, you should try adding other issues into the mix. Fortunately, usually many more elements than just the one main issue are important in negotiations. The art of win-win negotiating is to piece together those elements like putting together a jigsaw puzzle so that both people can win. Rule one is, don't narrow the negotiations down to just one issue. While we may resolve impasses by finding a common ground on small issues to keep the negotiation moving, you should never narrow it down to one issue.

Rule two of win-win negotiating: People are not out for the same thing

Rule number two that makes you a win-win negotiator is the understanding that people are not out for the same thing. We all have an overriding tendency to assume that other people want what we want, and because of this we believe that what's important to us will be important to them. But that's not true.

The biggest trap into which neophyte negotiators fall is assuming that price is the dominant issue in a negotiation. Many other elements, other than price, that are important to the other person.

You must convince her of the quality of your product or service. He needs to know that you will deliver on time.

She wants to know that you will give adequate management supervision to their account. How flexible are you on payment terms?

Does your company have the financial strength to be a partner of theirs?

Do you have the support of a well-trained and motivated work force?

These all come into play, along with half-a-dozen other factors. When you have satisfied the other person that you can meet all those requirements, then, and only then, does price become a deciding factor. So, the second key to win-win negotiating is this: Don't assume that they want what you want. Because if you do, you further make the assumption that anything you do in the negotiations to help them get what they want helps them and hurts you.

Win-win negotiating can come about only when you understand that people don't want the same things in the negotiation. So Power Negotiating becomes not just a matter of getting what you want, but also being concerned about the other person getting what he or she wants. One of the most powerful thoughts you can have when you're negotiating with someone is not: &quot;What can I get from them?&quot; but &quot;What can I give them that won't take away from my position?&quot; Because when you give people what they want, they will give you what you want in a negotiation.

Rule three of win-win negotiating: Don't try to get the last dollar off the table

The third key to win-win negotiating is this: Don't be too greedy. Don't try to get the last dollar off the table. You may feel that you triumphed, but does that help you if the other person felt that you vanquished him? That last dollar left on the table is a very expensive dollar to pick up. A man who attended my seminar in Tucson told me that he was able to buy the company that he owned because the other potential buyer made that mistake. The other person had negotiated hard and pushed the seller to the brink of frustration. As a final Nibble, the buyer said, &quot;You are going to put new tires on that pickup truck before you transfer title aren't you?&quot;

That straw broke the proverbial camel's back. The owner reacted angrily, refused to sell his company to him, and instead sold it to the man at my seminar.

So, don't try to get it all, but leave something on the table so that the other person feels that she won also.

Rule four of win-win negotiating: Put something back on the table The fourth key to win-win negotiating is this: Put something back on the table when the negotiation is over. I don't mean by telling them that you'll give them a discount over and above what they negotiated. I mean do something more than you promised to do. Give them a little extra service. Care about them a little more than you have to. Then you'll find that the little extra for which they didn't have to negotiate means more to them that everything for which they did have to negotiate.

Now let me recap what I believe about win-win negotiating:

People have different personality styles, and because of this, they negotiate differently. You must understand your personality style, and, if it's different from the other person, you must adapt your style of negotiating to theirs.

The different styles mean that in a negotiation, different people have different goals, relationships, styles, faults, and different methods of getting what they want.

Winning is a perception, and by constantly servicing the perception that the other person is winning you can convince him that he has won without having to make any concessions to him.

Don't narrow the negotiation down to just one issue.

Don't assume that helping the other person get what he wants takes away from your position. You're not out for the same thing. Poor negotiators try to force the other person to get off the positions that they've taken. Power negotiators know that even when positions are 180 degrees apart the interests of both sides can be identical, so they work to get people off their positions and concentrating on their interests.

Don't be greedy. Don't try to get the last dollar off the table. Put something back on the table. Do more than they bargained for.

Roger Dawson<Br> Founder of the Power Negotiating Institute<Br> 800-932-9766<Br> <a href="mailto:RogDawson@aol.com">RogDawson@aol.com</a><Br> <a target="_new" href="http://www.rdawson.com">http://www.rdawson.com</a>

7 Tips for Bartering Products and Services

What better way to gain a new customer than by getting something you need in return? The following are tips to help you use bartering correctly, and make it a good experience for both you and who you are bartering with.

1. Make It Fair
Be sure you are both trading a fair value including shipping. It may be neccessary to trade more than one product/service or issue a gift certificate for the remaining amount.

2. Needs Only
Only barter if they (or you) need the product or service

3. Keep Records
Keep a good record of your barters. Treat it just as you would an actual sale.

4. Communicate
Keep in good contact with the person you are bartering with, both durring and after the trade.

5. Be Specific
Be specific on what you have to offer and what you want. You don't want to be wasting your time (or other's) answer requests to products/services you don't need.

6. Look for Barters in Appropriate Places
There are several different ways you can seek out what you need. Visiting message boards/groups making announcements in appropriate catagories is one way. Many sites also have a special section just for bartering. A few of these sites are:

http://www.momsmarketonline.com
http://www.dotcomwomen.com
http://www.wahmnetwork.com
http://www.bizzymommyswah.com

Be sure to look at the current barters listed to see you have a match.

7. Most importantly, have fun!

About the author: Kara Kelso is a work at home mom of two, and the co-owner of Direct Sales Helpers, which is dedicated to helping mothers succeed in direct sales. For more information, visit: <a target="_new" href="http://www.DirectSalesHelpers.com">http://www.DirectSalesHelpers.com</a>

Better Internal Proposals

A colleague of mine has a problem. We belong to the same association and he's been trying for quite some time, without success, to get support for one of his proposals.

His lack of results came to mind when a reader asked for ideas about making internal proposals more effective. As she noted in her message, it's necessary to make a business case for proposals, including costs and returns.

She's right, and I agree wholeheartedly. In fact I just finished a proposal to an organization I work with and had it accepted on that sort of basis.

But, I think all good proposals start where my colleague has trouble. They start with a clear and concise statement about the project: "This is what I recommend, this is the issue (problem or opportunity) it addresses, and these are the consequences (benefits) of doing what I recommend."

I frequently come across situations where ideas don't fly because the person making the proposal hasn't prepared that kind of analysis and statement. While the virtue of the ideas seems apparent to him or to her, it's not at all apparent to others. I've referred to it elsewhere as the 'Everybody knows' syndrome.

To do the analysis, and later write the statement, start with a description of the action that you want taken. In just a few words, write down the what you want to see happen, and how it changes the status quo. For example, I recently went to a meeting with a proposal that went like this: Change the duration of our event to four weeks from the current duration of six weeks, to reduce our costs during a slow period.

Next, name or list the people or functions involved. Who will take the action? Do you want just one person to act, or several, or many? And, if it involves a multi-stage action, set out the stages. For example, "I would like this committee to formulate a recommendation we can put to a vote at the annual meeting."

Follow that with a list of people and organizations affected by the action. Be thorough in this consideration; it's all to easy to forget the peripheral players. And very often peripheral players make a critical difference to our plans.

Now, is there a timeline or sequence of events that needs consideration before a decision can be made or implemented? Almost everything we do in large modern organizations is interconnected to other people and resources. And, what about contingencies? Does your proposal depend on something else happening?

Having thoroughly explored the proposal and its implications, we now turn to costs and benefits, the business case. What are the tangible and intangible costs? In the intangibles column, make at least a mental note of the emotional costs that key stakeholders will pay. The same is generally true of benefits, or the returns if we're talking about financial components. Remember the important role emotions often play in decisions.

In summary, then, take a strategic approach to internal proposals, an approach that identifies the issues, the players, and the consequences. This exercise allows you to be clear and concise because you have thought your way through the proposal carefully, and you know the key issues.

Robert F. Abbott writes and publishes Abbott's Communication Letter. Learn how you can use communication to help achieve your goals, by reading articles or subscribing to this ad-supported newsletter. An excellent resource for leaders and managers, at: <a target="_new" href="http://www.communication-newsletter.com">http://www.communication-newsletter.com</a>

วันพฤหัสบดีที่ 27 พฤศจิกายน พ.ศ. 2551

Managing Conflict, in Life & Work: Using Ancient and Modern Approaches

&quot;Conflict&quot; is a word that can have varying degrees of severity, meaning, and implication for each individual or circumstance. For example, the conflict that is experienced in our current, daily lives seems insignificant in comparison to the Samurai, or those in war, who faced death on a regular basis. However, it is still important to extrapolate the significant lessons that have been derived from such severe scenarios, as these notions are still applicable in the conflict that we experience in the workplace and life today.

Conflict is unavoidable, as each individual has unique and differing thoughts, ideas, and opinions. Therefore, it is important to learn ways to minimize and manage this difficulty, in order to ensure efficient and harmonious interactions. This article provides the genesis of a personal path, introducing tools and ways to minimize and manage conflict, while pointing to the origin of these concepts. After an overview of these modern and ancient approaches, a discussion will follow on applying successful tools and techniques for managing conflict. These ideas can be used to help clear the mind for better decision-making, and consequently, ensure a personal pathway to success.

New approaches to ancient concepts

Profound strategies and lessons to minimize and manage conflict have been around for thousands of years in forms such as the classic Chinese texts the &quot;Book of Change ? Tao de Ching&quot; and the &quot;Art of War&quot;. Today, modern legends including Stephen Covey (&quot;7 Habits for Highly Effective People&quot;) and Dale Carnegie present similar corporate and personal tools. As many know the &quot;7 Habits&quot; is not a group of new concepts, but age-old approaches to success and conflict management, represented in a way that can be clearly applied to modern day personal and corporate development.

Discovering the origin & foundation of concepts

Although many of the true ancient concepts have been exaggerated or misused through incorrect interpretations, they can be applied in non-extreme forms relevant to the modern day from such arts as: Zen (which is not a religion, but a path for self discovery and growth), the &quot;Art of War&quot; by Sun Tzu (the classic text on strategy which is often regarded as the most definitive text on the topic), and the Tao de Ching (the &quot;book of change&quot;). These all provide profound lessons for leadership, change, success, peace of mind and conflict management.

A workplace example ? an tense group meeting debating a topic

If one has to enter a meeting with a number of staff peers on a topic that is likely to require an intense debate, a strategy can be put into place to help provide a successful outcome (this should be combined with the other approaches outlined below). For example, one can approach the members of the meeting individually prior to the meeting to convey your preferred position. Once the meeting has started you will hopefully already have likely confrontational people already &quot;on-side&quot; to achieve your desired outcome in a non-confrontational way.

The Key to Managing Conflict: bringing it all together, and applying it today

All the above methods (old and new) are about changing core behavior and approaches, in order to avoid conflict and simultaneously achieve personal success.

As Sun Tzu states:

&quot;If you know yourself and know others ? you will be successful.

If you know others and not yourself, you will win one and lose one.

If you do not know others and do not know yourself, you are destined for failure in every battle.&quot;

These are core values, and far more important than putting band-aids on problems, or approaching things with simply a short-term change. In regard to the ancient philosophies, they of course must be interpreted, and applied, using case studies and real world examples in a context that matches the modern corporate world. Applied Zen (www.AppliedZen.com) is a company that provides workshops, and downloadable videos online, regarding these exact topics with a unique approach. This is achieved through implementation of physical interaction drills to reinforce the concepts covered in workshop presentations. Studies have shown that learning conflict management based on physical as well as mental practice greatly increases the participants' retention, and consequently, aids in implementation (more than 2 to 3 fold improvement).

Aggressive escalation of conflict

Conflict is derived from many circumstances, but quite regularly it can be escalated because of a person's approach to the situation. In the Japanese language, there are two words that help to describe this: aiki and kiai. These words are derived from the same two characters, and are simply reversed to convey an opposite meaning. Kiai is a form of showing intensity and channelling it towards an individual, and in the martial arts 'kiai' is a very loud, expulsion of air and voice to intimidate or scare an opponent. Aiki is the opposite of head-to-head approaches and allows one to avoid escalating conflict (hence the martial art &quot;Aiki-do&quot;). Yet the approach still incorporates assertiveness a key attribute in any successful negotiation. Consider for a moment which concept would be most beneficial in dealing with conflict in a meeting at work or your personal life: kiai, or aiki?

&quot;Show softness yet engage the opponent with hardness. Show weakness yet engage with fluid strength&quot;

Obviously aiki is more practical, and will produce a more desired outcome. If we listen with the intent to understand - not to respond, if we get all our thoughts together before we confront another person, we can strategically work with someone to maintain our own balance and not produce antagonism in the person with whom we are dealing.

&quot;Reaching a centered state, so I can perform at my best&quot;

Having an open mind, and a relaxed physical and mental state will ensure I have an approach which is non-confrontational and provide a first step to maganging or avoiding conflict. An approach of aligning your thoughts and actions, and taking a moment to breathe and release tension, will create a more relaxed state within yourself as well as the person you are dealing with. This approach will enable you to convey your points in a way that your opponent will be unable to avoid or refuse. Settling oneself creates a calm and open mind: you are able to listen, think, and respond (in this order), and this is positively received by others. If you are able to settle yourself at any point (i.e. before, during, or after you feel aggression arising), others will respond to your calm, open mind, and it will put them into the same relaxed state. In various physical arts the importance of relaxed upper body, a low center of gravity and appropriate breathing creates this state. Zen and other conflict relevant arts have such Japanese terms such as &quot;mushin&quot;, &quot;mizu no kokoro&quot; and using the &quot;hara&quot; (stomach area) for creating and optimal physical state for mental performance.

Conflict within oneself ? perhaps the most important conflict to understand Lessons such as &quot;trying to defend/attack too many areas at once leaves the troops divided and weak&quot; from Sun Tzu can be translated to an individual. Just as Stephen Covey asks, &quot;How thin can you spread yourself before you are no longer there?&quot;. Applying such lessons to your life today can have a profound impact on personal conflict ? don't take on more than you can handle, or you will begin to sacrifice the very essence of who you are. Although it is not direct conflict between two people, it is still relevant. If you have conflict within yourself, you are destined to have conflict with others. You will understand that conflict is not merely the apparent external problems ? it also involves each individual and his/her conflicts within.

Sharpen the sword? This article provides and introduction to some of the methods and principles used in Applied Zen corporate training (www.AppliedZen.com). Businesses and individuals everywhere are using these philosophies to manage conflict more effectively and to achieve success. Therefore, it is essential to train one's skills & endure ongoing development. As the ancient Samurai saying states, &quot;Continuously sharpen the sword, or it will go blunt!&quot;

Definition of Conflict, Merriam/Webster Dictionary: 1 : FIGHT, BATTLE, WAR 2 a : competitive or opposing action of incompatibles : antagonistic state or action (as of divergent ideas, interests, or persons) b : mental struggle resulting from incompatible or opposing needs, drives, wishes, or external or internal demands 3 : the opposition of persons or forces that gives rise to the dramatic action in a drama or fiction

Copyright 2005 - Dr. Jason Armstrong and Dana Buchman

Jason Armstrong, Ph.D., has worked at CEO levels in Japan, the USA, & Australia. He has also consulted for large multi-national companies in Japan and has specialized in the "Art of War" for more than 20 years. His merging of Asian strategy and the business world was further developed by living with a Japanese budo master. In the last 6 years he has consulted with Japanese companies such as Mitsubishi Pharmaceutical and been General Manager of a US company in Tokyo. He has worked in both Biotech and Venture Capital Industries. Today he runs <a target="_new" href="http://www.AppliedZen.com">http://www.AppliedZen.com</a>, which provides online leadership training courses and conducts workshops in the USA Australia and Japan.

Making the Deal: Women as Negotiators

Negotiating is no game. It is not for the weak or the fragile. It takes assertiveness and someone who feels comfortable in the mano-a-mano world of business. Can women negotiate the deal as well as their male counterparts? Absolutely! In some cases, they may even do a better job. Women have a definite edge at the negotiating table because of their instincts and natural power of persuasion.

Women usually look for a win/win in negotiations. In Getting to Yes, the classic book on negotiation by the Harvard Negotiation Project, it was reported that the win/win strategy work best in negotiations. In order to avoid future resentments, all parties should come away feeling good about the resolution of a problem.

Traditionally, it is thought that whoever is on the other side in negotiations is the adversary. However, women tend to want to develop a relationship with the other person and take into account the needs and difficulties of both sides. Women also tend to collaborate and help one another if problems arise.

What traditional businesses have missed for far to long is the understanding that personal relationships, not the contract, profit margin, or delivery date is what give one the competitive edge. Historically, women have been seen as poor negotiators because they are influenced by the other party's situation. But if the truth were told women will more often than not work with their adversaries to reach a solution that is good for everyone involved.

Negotiating is a critical skill for all women aspiring to succeed in the business world. For those women who feel they are not good negotiators, they simply need to remember their natural talent of persuasion. Keep in mind even good negotiators will sometimes make mistakes. The key to avoiding these mistakes are: (1) attack the problem and not your adversary; (2) try to come up with several options; (3) never treat negotiations as a contest; (4) never threaten and (5) never give in to something that is contrary to what you believe is ethical.

The playing field for women in this arena has never been level. But women who have empowered themselves with the skills, knowledge, and confidence to negotiate at top levels have chosen a path that ultimately challenge the entrenched structures which have always hampered them. Women from childhood have been conditioned to be excellent negotiators. So ladies, do not be afraid to step up to table and negotiate with the big boys. Master the art of negotiating, use it with confidence, and the only limits to what you can achieve will be those placed upon yourself.

Ms. Lewis is President and CEO of The Deline Institute for Professional Development, a training organization which provides workshops and seminars geared toward businesswomen. Ms. Lewis is a native of New Orleans, Louisiana. She is an Adjunct Professor at National-Louis University, where she teaches Human Resource Management. Ms. Lewis has conducted training for the Federal government on Diversity, as well as EEO regulations and guidelines. Ms. Lewis is a certified trainer with the Professional Women Network, specializing in the area of Diversity with an emphasis in Women's Issues. Ms. Lewis is a member of the Professional Woman Network and Professional Woman Speakers Bureau; the National Association of Female Executives; The African American Federal Executive Association and Federally Employed Women. Ms. Lewis' knowledge of business and professionalism is supported by 21 years of work experience in the military and 18 years of continuous work experience as a civilian with the Federal government.

How To Deal With A Complainer

How To Deal With A Complainer

A Complainer Is Characterized by:

1. Dissatisfaction in their personal life
2. Anger
3. A desire to have their concerns acknowledged
4. Makes demands
5. Wants explanations
6. Makes threats or bluffs
7. Frustration

Description

Complainers have a gripe about everything in their life. This usually comes from the underlying fact that they are unsatisfied or disgruntled about their own personal lives. The complainer has a need for their concerns to be acknowledged. Whether it is in their professional or personal life, the complainer can't have peace of mind until someone listens to and acknowledges their concerns. They feel dissatisfied and they don't just want things to change-they want to be heard and understood.

How to Deal With the Complainer

The key to effectively dealing with a complainer is by using your active listening skills. They want to be heard and acknowledged-not ignored or argued with. You have to use your skills of empathy and try to understand what their interests and needs are.

1. Listen to their concerns. It's not enough sometimes just to fix the problem. The person has a psychological need for someone to acknowledge their concerns. Let them get all of those pent up frustrations out of their system before you address the problem. Listen and acknowledge what they have to say. Encourage them to keep on talking until all those frustrations have been let out.

2. Empathize with them. Imagine yourself walking around in their shoes and see the situation from their perspective. Empathy is an important tool that you can use to facilitate cooperation. Let them know that you understand their situation and make them feel comfortable and important. Use empathetic statements such as, &quot;If I were in your shoes, I'd be really angry too.&quot; Paraphrase their concerns back to them. Repeat their concerns back to them in your own words. This lets them know that you have been listening and it allows you to confirm that you have heard and understood everything correctly. Paraphrasing is also a powerful rapport-building tool.

3. Ask them what they would like you to do. In most cases, you will already know what the person wants, but ask them what they would like you to do anyways because it lets them walk away happy by giving them the amount of control they desire.

About The Author

Tristan Loo is an experienced negotiator and an expert in conflict resolution. He uses his law enforcement experience to train others in the prinicples of defusing conflict and reaching agreements. Visit his website at <a target="_new" href="http://www.streetnegotiation.com">http://www.streetnegotiation.com</a> or e-mail him directly at <a href="mailto:tristan@streetnegotiation.com">tristan@streetnegotiation.com</a>

วันจันทร์ที่ 24 พฤศจิกายน พ.ศ. 2551

Making the Deal: Women as Negotiators

Negotiating is no game. It is not for the weak or the fragile. It takes assertiveness and someone who feels comfortable in the mano-a-mano world of business. Can women negotiate the deal as well as their male counterparts? Absolutely! In some cases, they may even do a better job. Women have a definite edge at the negotiating table because of their instincts and natural power of persuasion.

Women usually look for a win/win in negotiations. In Getting to Yes, the classic book on negotiation by the Harvard Negotiation Project, it was reported that the win/win strategy work best in negotiations. In order to avoid future resentments, all parties should come away feeling good about the resolution of a problem.

Traditionally, it is thought that whoever is on the other side in negotiations is the adversary. However, women tend to want to develop a relationship with the other person and take into account the needs and difficulties of both sides. Women also tend to collaborate and help one another if problems arise.

What traditional businesses have missed for far to long is the understanding that personal relationships, not the contract, profit margin, or delivery date is what give one the competitive edge. Historically, women have been seen as poor negotiators because they are influenced by the other party's situation. But if the truth were told women will more often than not work with their adversaries to reach a solution that is good for everyone involved.

Negotiating is a critical skill for all women aspiring to succeed in the business world. For those women who feel they are not good negotiators, they simply need to remember their natural talent of persuasion. Keep in mind even good negotiators will sometimes make mistakes. The key to avoiding these mistakes are: (1) attack the problem and not your adversary; (2) try to come up with several options; (3) never treat negotiations as a contest; (4) never threaten and (5) never give in to something that is contrary to what you believe is ethical.

The playing field for women in this arena has never been level. But women who have empowered themselves with the skills, knowledge, and confidence to negotiate at top levels have chosen a path that ultimately challenge the entrenched structures which have always hampered them. Women from childhood have been conditioned to be excellent negotiators. So ladies, do not be afraid to step up to table and negotiate with the big boys. Master the art of negotiating, use it with confidence, and the only limits to what you can achieve will be those placed upon yourself.

Ms. Lewis is President and CEO of The Deline Institute for Professional Development, a training organization which provides workshops and seminars geared toward businesswomen. Ms. Lewis is a native of New Orleans, Louisiana. She is an Adjunct Professor at National-Louis University, where she teaches Human Resource Management. Ms. Lewis has conducted training for the Federal government on Diversity, as well as EEO regulations and guidelines. Ms. Lewis is a certified trainer with the Professional Women Network, specializing in the area of Diversity with an emphasis in Women's Issues. Ms. Lewis is a member of the Professional Woman Network and Professional Woman Speakers Bureau; the National Association of Female Executives; The African American Federal Executive Association and Federally Employed Women. Ms. Lewis' knowledge of business and professionalism is supported by 21 years of work experience in the military and 18 years of continuous work experience as a civilian with the Federal government.

Can a Corporate Executive Really Use The Beautiful Mind; To guide decision making?

I would like to comment on the &quot;A Beautiful Mind&quot; movie and the book, which was actually much better. I just finished reading another book on the similar side of John Nashs' assertion of working together rather than competing against. That book was &quot;Co-opetition.&quot; By Adam M. Brandenburger (Havard guy)and Barry J. Nalebuff (Yale Dude). Many have been aware of such theory for quite a while and practice such occasionally for the betterment of an industry or through the art of diplomacy, sometimes through misdirection and other times as an experiment (nothing more, nothing less) especially when it really does not matter and it is not really core to our direction and market domination strategy for any given region. I would have to differ from the movie version in that if you tried to run your business in the fashion that Jim Nash discussed in theory you might do well for a while, but would eventually get hammered in the market place, whether or not you actually were able to sleep with a brunette when you wanted the blond with the big bust (go see the movie, you will understand that comment). In theory it sounded wonderful in the movie yet would not take you very far in the cut throat world of business, even though the regulators always want to level the playing field, more often then not they are manipulated agents for the competition as indicated by Adam Smith, Carl Marx and Rodney Dangerfield in &quot;Back to School.&quot; The fact is that even the referees of business, namely the regulating bodies who want to see the playing field leveled usually tip it in the favor of a politically powerful and well connected companies which fund the campaigns of the over see'ers (politicians). Once the regulatory bodies find they have been duped rather than bring it up with the politicians, they want to punish all the players in the industry and kick them out of the game, of course this hurts the fans (consumers) and then the game (industry) and then the referees and fans are not needed (read; &quot;When Atlas Shrugged&quot; By Ayn Rand).

Unless a perfect and fair playing field exists John Nash's dream of a perfect system and economic structure cannot exist and that is pretty straight forward with the study of human psychology, Machiavelli, Maslow's hierarchy of needs, the prisoners, dilemma or a multitude of truisms surrounding human nature. The world does not work that way, it is not a perfect world and therefore such theories are not worthy of attempt although obviously interesting from an academia standpoint or discussion at the geological societies random coffee house dialogues.

The win-lose scenario keeps forcing someone to lose, if we were to really see the true picture here we would find that what John Nash was saying is that you need to take into consideration giving someone else what they want so you can get what you want. I say Obviously John is right. Too bad regulators condemn the greatest contributors of mankind, while the competitors cheat, the playing field is not leveled and the true voter of the monetary unit of trade called a dollar cannot see thru the clutter and scatter of the advertising and behind the scenes truisms of a system which is not all it seems.

When looking at the true methodology of John Nash's achievements it is fair to say that being able to put simple concepts into mathematical formulas will significantly help the future of computers capable of fuzzy logic calculate the answers to game theory, war efforts, strategic thinking and competition exposure in business. That will be one of the great achievements of his work, which will be in the future. However one who is at the helm of a business has other responsibilities such as the survival and profitability of the company and using John Nash's strict modeling in an imperfect world is dangerous to the ongoing vitality of a once going concern. Be careful to prematurely adopt perfect systems in an imperfect world.

"Lance Winslow" - If you have innovative thoughts and unique perspectives, come think with Lance; <a target="_new" href="http://www.WorldThinkTank.net/wttbbs">www.WorldThinkTank.net/wttbbs</a>

Negotiating Technology Contracts

Have you ever tried to negotiate a deal for software, computer equipment, or consulting services with a technology company? The task can be daunting. Unfortunately, the sales forces of most IT companies are armed to the hilt with techniques to get the best deal for them, and not necessarily the best deal for you. And even worse, most of us computer folk (like myself) have never been trained in the art of negotiation, so it can be difficult to spot a snake in the grass. Before you begin negotiating a technology deal, know what you're getting in to.

Solicit, Don't Be Solicited

I receive at least three calls each day from technology vendors interested in selling something: hardware equipment, software tools, consulting services, etc. Usually, these calls are "cold". My name somehow landed on a telemarketing list in the hands of some vendor who is calling me out of the clear blue sky hoping that what they sell somehow matches what I need. You can waste hours on the phone letting some non-technical, script-reading, telemarketer or sales representative chew your ear off about their latest and greatest gizmo. Very rarely do these types of calls ever translate into a real business opportunity.

The most popular cold call opening is "Good morning. This is Joe from the XYZ software company. We offer break through whatever solutions to help you reduce your total cost of ownership for whatever. Let me ask you, are your responsible for managing your companies whatever investment?" I get so many of these calls that I can answer them in my sleep. Years ago, I used to engage in some level of discussion with these people and it always went nowhere. Unless you really think they've got something you might want to buy, cut them off immediately. And just like any telemarketer, they have a scripted response for anything. If you answer the above question with "No. I am not". The immediate response will be "Could you direct me to someone in the company that is responsible for whatever". If you hand out a name and number, you're just passing the buck to some other poor soul in your organization. My favorite response is "No. We don't respond to phone solicitations." Nine times out of ten, they will give up.

Sometimes, the cold caller will make another run at it and re-state their purpose or as they close the call, sneak in another sales pitch. "Yes sir. I understand. We offer something really great for your company and would love to send you a free trial version at absolutely no cost. Its free to try." You could be tempted to say "Free? Tell me more." Again, this type of response will just open up the sales speech flood gates and you will be wasting your time trying to get a word in edge-wise. Stick to your guns: "As I said. We don't respond to phone solicitations." is the proper response. If they make yet one more run at it, the final blow would be "Not sure if you're deaf, but I said we don't respond to phone solicitations. Tell me your name and transfer me to your supervisor." You will either hear apologies or a dial tone. Either way, you've just gotten yourself off of a call list and will never be bothered again.

If you're interested in buying something, you do the calling, not the other way around.

Put The Horse Before The Cart

Never begin looking for technology solutions without knowing what you're looking for. Know the business problem you're trying to solve. If you know you need a software package that automates statistical analysis, flush out a more detailed set of statistics requirements (types of model, sample sizes, etc.) before you begin to shop around. Usually, software products have bells and whistles that, although look cool, are not absolutely needed. Before you begin comparison shopping, define your basic technology and business requirements. Knowing what you really need will give you confidence and leverage in a negotiation.

Always Comparison Shop

No matter what, always evaluate multiple options. If you're looking for software, don't get excited and latch on to the first package that looks good. And certainly don't give a sales rep. the impression that you're overly interested in their solution. They will be less likely to move during a negotiation. The IT market is over abundant with hardware, software and services solutions. Probably, you will have many options to choose from. Be picky!

Create Your Game Plan

Before you begin negotiating a deal with any technology vendor, plan your negotiation carefully. I have included some general planning questions that you should answer in preparation for a negotiation. The questions I have listed below may not make sense for your negotiation, so feel free to modify them for the occasion. The point here is to prepare in advance. You don't want to figure out the answers to these types of questions in the middle of a negotiation as it may give an inch to the sales person. I would even recommend writing the questions and answers on a sheet of paper for reference.

(Price) How much do you think you should pay for this software or service? What is the market rate or street price? What are you prepared to spend? What is the highest price you would be willing to pay?

(Features) What key features and capabilities are you looking for? Force rank the features. What does the prioritized list look like? Of the features you need, categorize them into two categories: "must have" and "nice to have".

(Service Levels) Do you expect some level of performance from the equipment, software, or service? Are there up-time requirements? Do you need 24x7 technical support? Do you expect the vendor to incur a penalty if they don't perform up to your service levels?

(Trades) What is most important to you: price, features, or service level? Force rank these in order of importance. Would you be willing to trade items between categories? For example, would you be willing to give up a certain service level for a lower price?

(Suppliers) Which vendors offer something that you think could meet your needs? How long have these companies been in business? Are you doing business with them already? Do you have a good business relationship with them?

(Gravy) If you had your druthers, what extras would you like the vendor to throw in for free? Would you like training or extra manuals? Would you like special reporting?

You will probably have more questions in addition to the ones listed above. Take the time to write them down and create the answers. Once you have established your position, you will save a great deal of time evaluating your potential vendors and negotiations will be less painful.

Lead The Dance

When you are ready to face off with a vendor, do your best to drive the discussion. Get as much information about the vendor and their product and service before price enters into the discussion. Just like car buying, pick out your car (or choice of cars) before you negotiate a price. If you find that the discussion is prematurely heading toward pricing, bring the conversation back to understanding the product or service itself. If you're not ready to talk price, say something like "Right now, I am just evaluating your product (or service). Unless I think there's a real opportunity, I'm not prepared to negotiate price right now."

Pricing for hardware, software, and services follow very different models. Hardware prices are fairly standard unless the product is new. Usually, the mark-up on hardware is very small (1-15%). On the flip- side, the mark-up for software is huge (100%+). Software is priced based on value, not the cost to the vendor so you can usually negotiate software prices down substantially. Services are usually based on labor rates and are marked up based on the demand for those skills (15-50%).

When you are ready to discuss pricing, take the lead in the dance. Here are the steps to follow (in this order):

<li>Make the vendor throw out the first offer. Never be the first one to suggest a price. Although rare, you could hear the question "how much would you be willing to pay for our product?" A good response would be "As little as possible. What's your offer?" This response puts the ball firmly in the vendor's court. Remember, if you've done your planning, you really do have the answer to this question, but your job is get a price far below your maximum, so don't tell the vendor up front!

<li>Express concern. Never get excited about the first offer no matter what. If you're considering other alternatives, you may be able to get a better price. My favorite tactic is to say nothing and simply make a non-verbal expression of concern. Usually, the vendor will come back with either "but I'm sure we could sharpen our pencil", or "we could probably come down lower if that price is too high", or the ever popular "but we're willing to work with you". You may also be prodded with "You don't seem to like that price. I seem to be out of the ball park. What price would you be comfortable with?" Here's where the dance gets interesting.

<li>Make the vendor throw out the second offer. This can be difficult, but by making the vendor throw out more prices, you are lowering the ceiling of the negotiation going forward. If, in step 2, the vendor says "we could probably come down lower if that price is too high.", immediately respond with "How much could you come down?" or "It seems you didn't give me your best price to begin with. What's your best price?". Latch on to what a vendor is saying and keep asking questions. Stay on this step as long as possible and try and keep the vendor to continue to provide better pricing.

<li>Counter offer. Propose a different price than what's on the table. Be reasonable. If you've done your homework and checked the going price for the product or service, you know what the range is. If you throw out a price that you know is ridiculous, it will look like you don't know what you're doing. However, if you counter with a price that demonstrates that you've done your homework, the vendor will know you are serious. Justify for your counter offer. For example, you may want to reveal that you've done some market analysis by saying "I've researched the market a little and think my offer is more in line with market prices." Obviously, the vendor may disagree, but at least you're backing up your counter price.

<li>Trade. Unless you can land on a price outright, there will likely be gives and takes on both sides. Go back to your to plan and begin proposing trades. Always make trades that bring you little to no value but may be perceived as valuable by the vendor. This can be very difficult, but can pay huge dividends. Here is a perfect example. Let's say you want a service contract to outsource your help desk (technical support phone service). Let's say you really want the help desk to answer your calls within 1 minute (you've already figured out this requirement in your plan) but the vendor's first offer is to answer your calls within 30 seconds. Let's also assume that price is more important to you than having your calls answered 30 seconds faster (remember- the vendor doesn't know this). And let's say the offer on the table is $5 per call. A great trade proposal would be "Your price is too high for me. I can recognize that you need enough people to answer those calls within 30 seconds and that has value. I would be willing to sacrifice an extra 30 seconds on each call if you could bring your price down." If the vendor responds with a counter-offer, circle back to steps 4 and 5. Try and keep the counter offer / trade cycle going as long as possible.

<li>Nibble. Just as you and the vendor are about to agree to terms and everyone starts smiling and shaking hands, start asking for the gravy. Let's say you've just negotiated a software deal and you would really like some training. Just when you think the vendor believes the negotiation is at its very end, you could say "I am really glad we could work this out. I'm looking forward to using your software. One more thing- would you mind spending a couple days showing me how to use your product. A little training could be useful. Is that ok with you?" You run the risk of opening up the negotiation, but you stand a better chance of getting a few extras free of charge.

<li>Walk The Talk. If you've set your maximum price and you can't seem to negotiate what you want even with trades, walk away. Be firm and truly be prepared to walk away. Be blunt. "It seems we're not getting anywhere. I think I'll take my business elsewhere. Thanks for your time." Shutting the discussion down can sometimes break the log jam. If a vendor really thinks they're going to loose the business, they may suddenly move.

<li>Patience is a Virtue. Negotiations take time. Before you begin, know what your timeframe to make a decision is. Never act hurried or anxious. Come across to the vendor as relaxed and confident (but not cocky). The message you want to send to the vendor is "I've got all the time in the world."

<li>Never Lie. Although this happens in many negotiations, telling lies will hurt your reputation and could poison vendor relationships. I am not a proponent of outright fibbing. Be honest but don't give away your hand.

Follow these steps, and you will strike better deals and build confidence in your ability to negotiate. What I have left out in the steps above are standard questions that vendors love to ask. Let me leave you with these questions, their underlying motive, and what you should say. The trick is to always put the ball back in the vendor's court to better your position:

<ul><li>Question: "What's your budget for this project?"

Motive: Setting the price floor

Answer: "That's confidential. Why do you need to know that?"</li>

<li>Question: "What's most important to you? Price or service levels?"

Motive : Prioritizing your trades

Answer : "They're both important to me. I'm looking for the best package"</li>

<li>Question: "How soon do you need to make a decision?"

Motive: Setting the timeframe

Answer : "I will make a decision when I can get the overall best deal"</li>

<li>Question: "Can you make decision quickly. I've got to make my sales quota and our quarter is ending soon. I can't guarantee I give you the same discount"

Motive : Apply pressure

Answer : "I'm not going to rush my decision because of your company's business calendar. We may need to re-think things..." </li></ul>

There are others, but always maintain your control, patience and poise and always take the lead in the negotiating dance!

About The Author

Andy Quick is co-founder of Findmyhosting.com (<a href="http://www.findmyhosting.com" target="_new">http://www.findmyhosting.com</a>), a free web hosting directory offering businesses and consumers a hassle free way to find the right hosting plan for their needs. Feel free to contact Andy at <a href="mailto:andy@findmyhosting.com">andy@findmyhosting.com</a> in case you have any questions or comments regarding this article.

วันอาทิตย์ที่ 23 พฤศจิกายน พ.ศ. 2551

So Whats Your Argument?

Arguments aren't always bad things. Sometimes They're used to convince someone of an important point they may not yet realize.

You've probably used arguments in this way most of your life in fact!

Maybe you wanted to go somewhere and had to convince your parents that is was a good idea to let you go. So you argued your position with them.

Maybe you wanted to buy a big ticket item and had to argue the value of buying it with your spouse!

Arguments don't necessarily have to be shouting matches. They can simply be a device used to convince someone of something that you feel is important.

It's funny then, how so few sales people use the art of arguing to sell their products. Wouldn't a person who wants someone to buy something from them want to try and convince that one that it'd be a good idea?

Maybe it's because it's not such a good idea?

Could be why so many sales pitches are designed to connive potential customers into buying rather than giving them a convincing argument instead.

Let's face it . . .

Who'd want to argue a losing point?

After all, if a product is of little value, who in their right mind would want to take the position of trying to convince someone it had value?

Maybe that's why so few try to convince rather than connive!

But what is the difference between convincing and conniving anyway?

A conniver is like the person in a movie or TV show that's holding something they probably shouldn't be. Suddenly, a cop pulls up and he quickly passes the object to the person next to him with the words, "Here, take this quick!"

The poor unsuspecting by-stander is "left holding the bag", and doesn't know what hit him as he's dragged off to the pokey.

So, to put it simply . . .

A conniver is the person who tries to get you to do something without thinking about it. He creates a sense of urgency and force feeds it to you before you can say no.

Now a convincer is quite the opposite. He wants you to know what you're getting into and is willing to spend the time going over it with you. He has a valid argument and has no qualms about letting you hear it.

So, by the time he hands you the "bag", you know exactly what's in it, and you've been able to make a rational decision about whether you want to "hold" it or not.

This leaves us with two important questions . . .

If you're searching the Internet looking for product to buy, who would you rather run into?

If you're trying to sell valuable products on the Internet, which of the above two do you think you should be?

Hopefully, the argument is clear!

About The Author

Ken Nadreau is the author of "Power Suits for Online Marketers." A free report that explains the three most important aspects of sales, and how using them, turns the average marketer into a legitimate, "well dressed" professional.

<a href="http://taoenterprises.com/powersuit/index.html" target="_new">http://taoenterprises.com/powersuit/index.html</a>

<a href="mailto:krnadreau@taoenterprises.com">krnadreau@taoenterprises.com</a>

Negotiating Tactics: How To Strike A Negotiable Opening Shot

There is no right or wrong to fire up your opening negotiation...

There may be a lot of people who are uncertain about the right way to start off a fruitful negotiation with their counterparts. They tend to think or behave as though there is really a &quot;right&quot; way to start it off, which eventually will make them expect the magic word &quot;yes&quot; from their opponent. I speak from my experience. There isn't any blueprint on how or what you should follow throughout your negotiation tactics, but perhaps there are several ways which you may want to consider.

Here are the 2 main important issues you need to consider when opening your negotiation talks.

a) Hear, understand and tackle the main issues first and foremost

b) Building a cooperative environment and getting the trust and respect from each other.

Say no to guerilla negotiating...

The first strategy is what I shall say, the most risky kind of tactic you shouldn't employ. If you demand too much in the first place, you may provoke and outrage the other opponent, which in the end may set your negotiations into a wrong direction. If things are so hard and difficult to come by for your opponent in the first place, do you think if by any chance that they will listen to you in the long run? They may not be aware of the significance of the main topics that you are bringing in, but tackling it later on will certainly save you a lot of time in the long run. Build rapport first.

Fostering a closer relationship...

If things are too difficult to handle in the first place, the safest bet you can take on is to look for points at the outset that might bring you closer to your opponent. For example, try to get to know them well, have a small talk on their thoughts and principles and what are their likes and dislikes. This is something like an information gathering sessions, for what you've gathered may actually help you handle issues that are raised subsequently.

But you are advised to be cautious when using this tactic as the opponent may actually trying to outsmart you before they become more aggressive in the future. With this closer tie, try not to be too encouraged to give away information which you should not.

The final part...

Whatever tactics you may use for your opening negotiation, always try to give yourself an added advantage by kicking off the negotiation. You may be able to handle the proceedings well and to sum up matters which are more favorable to you.

Sunny Tan
CEO
E Learning Avenue Inc
<a target="_new" href="http://www.elearning-avenue.com">http://www.elearning-avenue.com</a>
<a target="_New" href="http://www.elearning-avenue.com">Personal Development Elearning Courses provider</a>

Sunny Tan is an experienced ERP Project consultant who specializes in Human Resources, Payroll and Training industry. He currently runs his own company E Learning Avenue Inc, <a target="_new" href="http://www.elearning-avenue.com">http://www.elearning-avenue.com</a>, which provides many top-selling Personal Development el

Managing Conflict, in Life & Work: Using Ancient and Modern Approaches

&quot;Conflict&quot; is a word that can have varying degrees of severity, meaning, and implication for each individual or circumstance. For example, the conflict that is experienced in our current, daily lives seems insignificant in comparison to the Samurai, or those in war, who faced death on a regular basis. However, it is still important to extrapolate the significant lessons that have been derived from such severe scenarios, as these notions are still applicable in the conflict that we experience in the workplace and life today.

Conflict is unavoidable, as each individual has unique and differing thoughts, ideas, and opinions. Therefore, it is important to learn ways to minimize and manage this difficulty, in order to ensure efficient and harmonious interactions. This article provides the genesis of a personal path, introducing tools and ways to minimize and manage conflict, while pointing to the origin of these concepts. After an overview of these modern and ancient approaches, a discussion will follow on applying successful tools and techniques for managing conflict. These ideas can be used to help clear the mind for better decision-making, and consequently, ensure a personal pathway to success.

New approaches to ancient concepts

Profound strategies and lessons to minimize and manage conflict have been around for thousands of years in forms such as the classic Chinese texts the &quot;Book of Change ? Tao de Ching&quot; and the &quot;Art of War&quot;. Today, modern legends including Stephen Covey (&quot;7 Habits for Highly Effective People&quot;) and Dale Carnegie present similar corporate and personal tools. As many know the &quot;7 Habits&quot; is not a group of new concepts, but age-old approaches to success and conflict management, represented in a way that can be clearly applied to modern day personal and corporate development.

Discovering the origin & foundation of concepts

Although many of the true ancient concepts have been exaggerated or misused through incorrect interpretations, they can be applied in non-extreme forms relevant to the modern day from such arts as: Zen (which is not a religion, but a path for self discovery and growth), the &quot;Art of War&quot; by Sun Tzu (the classic text on strategy which is often regarded as the most definitive text on the topic), and the Tao de Ching (the &quot;book of change&quot;). These all provide profound lessons for leadership, change, success, peace of mind and conflict management.

A workplace example ? an tense group meeting debating a topic

If one has to enter a meeting with a number of staff peers on a topic that is likely to require an intense debate, a strategy can be put into place to help provide a successful outcome (this should be combined with the other approaches outlined below). For example, one can approach the members of the meeting individually prior to the meeting to convey your preferred position. Once the meeting has started you will hopefully already have likely confrontational people already &quot;on-side&quot; to achieve your desired outcome in a non-confrontational way.

The Key to Managing Conflict: bringing it all together, and applying it today

All the above methods (old and new) are about changing core behavior and approaches, in order to avoid conflict and simultaneously achieve personal success.

As Sun Tzu states:

&quot;If you know yourself and know others ? you will be successful.

If you know others and not yourself, you will win one and lose one.

If you do not know others and do not know yourself, you are destined for failure in every battle.&quot;

These are core values, and far more important than putting band-aids on problems, or approaching things with simply a short-term change. In regard to the ancient philosophies, they of course must be interpreted, and applied, using case studies and real world examples in a context that matches the modern corporate world. Applied Zen (www.AppliedZen.com) is a company that provides workshops, and downloadable videos online, regarding these exact topics with a unique approach. This is achieved through implementation of physical interaction drills to reinforce the concepts covered in workshop presentations. Studies have shown that learning conflict management based on physical as well as mental practice greatly increases the participants' retention, and consequently, aids in implementation (more than 2 to 3 fold improvement).

Aggressive escalation of conflict

Conflict is derived from many circumstances, but quite regularly it can be escalated because of a person's approach to the situation. In the Japanese language, there are two words that help to describe this: aiki and kiai. These words are derived from the same two characters, and are simply reversed to convey an opposite meaning. Kiai is a form of showing intensity and channelling it towards an individual, and in the martial arts 'kiai' is a very loud, expulsion of air and voice to intimidate or scare an opponent. Aiki is the opposite of head-to-head approaches and allows one to avoid escalating conflict (hence the martial art &quot;Aiki-do&quot;). Yet the approach still incorporates assertiveness a key attribute in any successful negotiation. Consider for a moment which concept would be most beneficial in dealing with conflict in a meeting at work or your personal life: kiai, or aiki?

&quot;Show softness yet engage the opponent with hardness. Show weakness yet engage with fluid strength&quot;

Obviously aiki is more practical, and will produce a more desired outcome. If we listen with the intent to understand - not to respond, if we get all our thoughts together before we confront another person, we can strategically work with someone to maintain our own balance and not produce antagonism in the person with whom we are dealing.

&quot;Reaching a centered state, so I can perform at my best&quot;

Having an open mind, and a relaxed physical and mental state will ensure I have an approach which is non-confrontational and provide a first step to maganging or avoiding conflict. An approach of aligning your thoughts and actions, and taking a moment to breathe and release tension, will create a more relaxed state within yourself as well as the person you are dealing with. This approach will enable you to convey your points in a way that your opponent will be unable to avoid or refuse. Settling oneself creates a calm and open mind: you are able to listen, think, and respond (in this order), and this is positively received by others. If you are able to settle yourself at any point (i.e. before, during, or after you feel aggression arising), others will respond to your calm, open mind, and it will put them into the same relaxed state. In various physical arts the importance of relaxed upper body, a low center of gravity and appropriate breathing creates this state. Zen and other conflict relevant arts have such Japanese terms such as &quot;mushin&quot;, &quot;mizu no kokoro&quot; and using the &quot;hara&quot; (stomach area) for creating and optimal physical state for mental performance.

Conflict within oneself ? perhaps the most important conflict to understand Lessons such as &quot;trying to defend/attack too many areas at once leaves the troops divided and weak&quot; from Sun Tzu can be translated to an individual. Just as Stephen Covey asks, &quot;How thin can you spread yourself before you are no longer there?&quot;. Applying such lessons to your life today can have a profound impact on personal conflict ? don't take on more than you can handle, or you will begin to sacrifice the very essence of who you are. Although it is not direct conflict between two people, it is still relevant. If you have conflict within yourself, you are destined to have conflict with others. You will understand that conflict is not merely the apparent external problems ? it also involves each individual and his/her conflicts within.

Sharpen the sword? This article provides and introduction to some of the methods and principles used in Applied Zen corporate training (www.AppliedZen.com). Businesses and individuals everywhere are using these philosophies to manage conflict more effectively and to achieve success. Therefore, it is essential to train one's skills & endure ongoing development. As the ancient Samurai saying states, &quot;Continuously sharpen the sword, or it will go blunt!&quot;

Definition of Conflict, Merriam/Webster Dictionary: 1 : FIGHT, BATTLE, WAR 2 a : competitive or opposing action of incompatibles : antagonistic state or action (as of divergent ideas, interests, or persons) b : mental struggle resulting from incompatible or opposing needs, drives, wishes, or external or internal demands 3 : the opposition of persons or forces that gives rise to the dramatic action in a drama or fiction

Copyright 2005 - Dr. Jason Armstrong and Dana Buchman

Jason Armstrong, Ph.D., has worked at CEO levels in Japan, the USA, & Australia. He has also consulted for large multi-national companies in Japan and has specialized in the "Art of War" for more than 20 years. His merging of Asian strategy and the business world was further developed by living with a Japanese budo master. In the last 6 years he has consulted with Japanese companies such as Mitsubishi Pharmaceutical and been General Manager of a US company in Tokyo. He has worked in both Biotech and Venture Capital Industries. Today he runs <a target="_new" href="http://www.AppliedZen.com">http://www.AppliedZen.com</a>, which provides online leadership training courses and conducts workshops in the USA Australia and Japan.

Can a Corporate Executive Really Use The Beautiful Mind; To guide decision making?

I would like to comment on the &quot;A Beautiful Mind&quot; movie and the book, which was actually much better. I just finished reading another book on the similar side of John Nashs' assertion of working together rather than competing against. That book was &quot;Co-opetition.&quot; By Adam M. Brandenburger (Havard guy)and Barry J. Nalebuff (Yale Dude). Many have been aware of such theory for quite a while and practice such occasionally for the betterment of an industry or through the art of diplomacy, sometimes through misdirection and other times as an experiment (nothing more, nothing less) especially when it really does not matter and it is not really core to our direction and market domination strategy for any given region. I would have to differ from the movie version in that if you tried to run your business in the fashion that Jim Nash discussed in theory you might do well for a while, but would eventually get hammered in the market place, whether or not you actually were able to sleep with a brunette when you wanted the blond with the big bust (go see the movie, you will understand that comment). In theory it sounded wonderful in the movie yet would not take you very far in the cut throat world of business, even though the regulators always want to level the playing field, more often then not they are manipulated agents for the competition as indicated by Adam Smith, Carl Marx and Rodney Dangerfield in &quot;Back to School.&quot; The fact is that even the referees of business, namely the regulating bodies who want to see the playing field leveled usually tip it in the favor of a politically powerful and well connected companies which fund the campaigns of the over see'ers (politicians). Once the regulatory bodies find they have been duped rather than bring it up with the politicians, they want to punish all the players in the industry and kick them out of the game, of course this hurts the fans (consumers) and then the game (industry) and then the referees and fans are not needed (read; &quot;When Atlas Shrugged&quot; By Ayn Rand).

Unless a perfect and fair playing field exists John Nash's dream of a perfect system and economic structure cannot exist and that is pretty straight forward with the study of human psychology, Machiavelli, Maslow's hierarchy of needs, the prisoners, dilemma or a multitude of truisms surrounding human nature. The world does not work that way, it is not a perfect world and therefore such theories are not worthy of attempt although obviously interesting from an academia standpoint or discussion at the geological societies random coffee house dialogues.

The win-lose scenario keeps forcing someone to lose, if we were to really see the true picture here we would find that what John Nash was saying is that you need to take into consideration giving someone else what they want so you can get what you want. I say Obviously John is right. Too bad regulators condemn the greatest contributors of mankind, while the competitors cheat, the playing field is not leveled and the true voter of the monetary unit of trade called a dollar cannot see thru the clutter and scatter of the advertising and behind the scenes truisms of a system which is not all it seems.

When looking at the true methodology of John Nash's achievements it is fair to say that being able to put simple concepts into mathematical formulas will significantly help the future of computers capable of fuzzy logic calculate the answers to game theory, war efforts, strategic thinking and competition exposure in business. That will be one of the great achievements of his work, which will be in the future. However one who is at the helm of a business has other responsibilities such as the survival and profitability of the company and using John Nash's strict modeling in an imperfect world is dangerous to the ongoing vitality of a once going concern. Be careful to prematurely adopt perfect systems in an imperfect world.

"Lance Winslow" - If you have innovative thoughts and unique perspectives, come think with Lance; <a target="_new" href="http://www.WorldThinkTank.net/wttbbs">www.WorldThinkTank.net/wttbbs</a>

Determine Your Rate And Negotiate Carefully With Unreasonable Clients

Consultants who offer executive assistant or computer services on a virtual basis must know their value and be prepared to gauge their billable rate to meet the circumstances.

At some point everyone encounters potential clients who expect professional work at rates that are less than appropriate. For example, a posting advertises an opportunity that matches your highly polished skill set. After making contact with the client you find they don't want to pay a reasonable fee for the services they expect.

While these types of engagements might help to build a newcomer's portfolio or pay some bills when money is tight, a successful virtual service provider knows their value and refuses to be exploited. Make sure clients understands your training, background and areas of expertise. Then, set expectations for services by pricing in accordance with your qualifications and skills.

Be prepared to be flexible, yet firm in your compensation requirements.

? Determine your base rate in advance of client discussions. Scratch it out on paper or create a spreadsheet. Take into account the fixed overhead and variable costs to legally operate your business

? Determine your flex-rates for times you might be willing to work for slightly less or feel the need to demand more pay.

? Calculate the value added for meeting tight time constraints, the demanding nature of the client or the complexity of the project

? Take the time to project costs not otherwise considered in your base rate (long distance, printing, etc.)

A pre-determined rate scale helps you respond calmly and logically to stressful situations, so you can advert potential disasters.

Last year I turned down what seemed on paper to be an ideal &quot;personal assistant&quot; opportunity. The ad described duties such as checking email and preparing responses on the client's behalf. Work assignments would be completed by phone and fax for a client who did not want to use a computer.

The job matched my skill set, but I chose to pass because:

1. The offered rate was 50% less than the low end of my base rate range.

2. The client expected me to own and pay for the operation of a fax machine, but was unwilling to pay for its purchase or operation.

3. The client expected a commitment to work for him part-time, even though hours were going to be determined by him each week

4. The client's refusal to even consider using a computer was destined to create confusion and conflict over what I prepared on his behalf

Regrettably, I realized this potential client was a fussy, technology laggard who wanted a very experienced, highly reliable personal assistant who was agreeable to an entry level rate.

Know when to &quot;pass" on a client so you can continue to market to more viable prospects. Try to negotiate a better rate with clients by matching their expectations with your level of service. Keep an eye out for performance bonuses or other types of perks to balance out discounted rates for good clients.

Elisa Shostak is the founder of Compass Rose Strategic Consulting LLC, an advisory service and secondary research firm based in Seattle, Washington.

This is the first in a series of articles about negotiating with clients and managing a management consulting practice.

Elisa can be contacted through her website: <a target="_new" href="http://www.compassrosellc.com">http://www.compassrosellc.com</a> or blog <a target="_new" href="http://www.compassrosestrategic.com">http://www.compassrosestrategic.com</a>